'Ka ni Kim

We got engaged in 2021 (details here in case you missed it!). For the next year and five-ish months, we poured a lot of time into preparing for the big day. One of the things I was most particular about was what I would wear to walk down the aisle.

When I flew to the States to visit my mom, we checked out some wedding dresses the day I landed. I hadn’t decided on a specific style just yet, but it was fun to try a few on.

After more consideration (and a lot of scrolling through Pinterest), I thought about paying tribute to my Japanese heritage. I didn’t want to go head-to-toe traditional, but I liked the idea of having a obi on over my wedding gown. Mom and I headed over to Nichi Bei Bussan in Japantown, San Jose. It was late afternoon, and they very kindly let us in right before closing.

Nichi Bei Bussan has an impressive selection of obis. They also sell kimonos, tatami zori (sandals), martial arts gear, various decorations and gifts, and other goods from Japan. Ms. Arlene and Ms. Miho assisted us and helped us pick out a pale gold obi with brown, deep red, and dark green details.

We also got a red shibori sash (pictured below). Shibori is a Japanese take on tie-dyeing which uses stitching and folding techniques to create intricate patterns on the cloth.

To tie everything together, we got a light pink cord, traditionally called an obijime. The obijime is typically worn in the middle of the obi to adjust the tightness of the belt and accessorize it.

When I flew back home, I asked around about dress shops and designers. My favorite makeup artist and dear friend Paolo referred us to King George Bueno, and introduced us at a local bridal fair.

We were impressed and excited to have King start a sketch of the dress right then and there at his booth.

We talked through some initial ideas – style, colors, what I wanted to bring attention to and away from. I also showed him a photo of the obi and told him how I’d like to incorporate it into my wedding day get-up.

At this point in our planning, EJ and I hadn’t really talked about the “first look” moment yet. We both weighed in on the initial design. However, once the garment was coming together, at King’s suggestion, EJ sat outside for the fitting to preserve the element of surprise on the big day. So the true first look was when I walked down the aisle – or as it turned out, down some stairs, and then the aisle. (Stay tuned for content about our beautiful venue!)

King chose the color of the dress to complement the obi. Since the obi had a sort of nature motif, we talked about having similar details on the gown itself. He planned for leafy vines cascading down the shoulders and back, as well the bodice. There were also some vines trailing down the top part of the skirt.

With the obi on, the delicately stitched and beaded leaves seemed to fall into and extend out of the flowers and trees on the belt. King also did some beading and studding on the obi itself to bring out the details.

I initially toyed with the idea of an outfit change going from the ceremony to the reception, but decided against it. Instead, I simply took off the obi and the veil and had my hair down for the party.

I did this for two reasons – the first being my own relief. Sitting down in an obi is not the most comfortable position, and my posture is terrible 80% of the time. The second reason was to show off the ruching on the top half of the gown, as well as the rest of the stitching that was hidden by the belt.

Before my wedding, I had never had any kind of clothing custom made for myself. This was definitely the occasion to do it! I loved being able to honor my heritage in my own small, not-strictly-traditional way. It meant a lot to me to be able to wear this obi, a gift from my mother which also reminds me of my paternal grandmother and namesake.

The individual pieces from opposite ends of the ocean all came together beautifully. All I need now is another event or two where I can wear my gorgeous dress!

Nichi Bei Bussan is located at 140 Jackson Street, San Jose, California. They have been operating for over a hundred years and are well worth a visit! Learn more on their website and Instagram.

King George Bueno Atelier has set up shop at room A309 in the Lopez Building, along Session Road. Message him on Facebook for inquiries and check out more of his stunning work on Instagram.

All photos of the dress and the event by the incredible Amy Ave team – check them out on Facebook.